Monday, October 15, 2007

Festival Fun

Last Saturday I took the kids to the Butterfly Festival and we met up with my best friend, who lives too far away from us to see often enough. She has a 4 month old baby and a 7 year old step-daughter. The day started off wonderfully; the weather was good, the kids were in good moods, and I felt good. Yup, everything was good. I put the baby in the umbrella stroller so I wouldn't have to maneuver the double stroller through the huge crowds and small spaces and put our bag of stuff in the basket of my friend's stroller.

There was a booth to buy these humongous, delicious-looking snow cones so of course I bought one for the kids and I to share. After the kids did some arts and crafts and saw all the sights, we decided to leave and eat lunch at Chili's. We had been there for just over 2 hours, and really, how much Butterfly Festival can four kids (and their moms) handle?

So my friend and I walked our broods to the parking garage, went up the elevator (she was on the 2nd level and I was on the 3rd), and parted ways until we would meet up again at the restaurant about 5 minutes away. When I got to my car I realized I had forgotten my bag in Lisa's stroller. Thank God!--I had my cell phone in my back pocket. Just as I was reaching for it, Lisa was calling me to tell me to wait by my car so she could bring me my bag, which held my keys. So there we were, waiting patiently and snapping photos by the car when Sarah decided she had to pee. I keep a potty chair in the car just for situations like this, but with no car keys it didn't do me much good. Lisa finally came around the corner with the forgotten bag and I dug in for the keys as she drove off to get at table at the restaurant.

Yes! I got the car opened, put the potty in the correct position, turned to pick Sarah up and put her on it, and stopped. She was standing in a little puddle with a big grin on her face. "PEE!" she gleefully said, like I should be just as relieved as her. So I got the bag of spare clothes that I keep in the car (again, just for situations like this) and searched for a new outfit. Okay so she was all cleaned up and sitting safely strapped in her car seat. Now I could get the baby into his car seat--oops, nope--first I have to change his diaper because with all the spare time he had he pooped. Several minutes later Patrick was cleaned up and in the car, Sarah was cleaned up and in the car...then to put all the accessories in the car. I thought of my poor friend sitting at Chili's waiting for me, possibly imagining a flat tire scene, as I climbed into the driver's seat when I heard the sound-okay, one of the sounds-that every parent dreads. The puke sound. Electric blue snow-cone leftovers covered the car seat and everything surrounding the car seat within a 2 foot radius. Sigh. Dig in the bag for more emergency clothes. Uh-oh. No more emergency clothes!? Hmm, no big deal, I just have to improvise. Sarah's a petite girl. Maybe she would fit into Patrick's 12 month size onesie? I admit she looked a little...creative...but hey, at least she was dressed! I did have a skirt in the bag so that helped. After a quick phone call to apologize to Lisa we were on our way!

We had a relatively uneventful lunch (yay!), and after saying our good-byes I felt the need to go to Old Navy. We're so close! And we don't have an Old Navy near our house! I can pull this off! On went my inner pep talk. Full of confidence I pulled into the parking spot, unloaded all the gear and kids, and we went in the store. I am in desperate need of (bigger) clothing like most mothers so I decided to try on a couple of pairs of jeans. I have no idea what made me think I was going to be able to try on clothes. We waited for 10 minutes for the big dressing room to open up so we could all fit, and during that time-of course-Sarah had to pee again. Or so she said. I reluctantly left the stroller in the young employee's care and ventured into the store's bathroom. After liberally applying toilet paper to the seat and pulling clothes off of Sarah (all one-handed mind you) she sat there and produced nothing. Grrrr. All that work for nothing! So by the time we got back to the fitting room it was open and we went in. Off came my pants. Down went the sippy cup. Bang went the door. As in: Oh-crap!-Sarah-just-opened-the-door-and-my-half-naked-body-is-exposed-for-the-world-to-see! AGGHHHHH!!! I hate when she does that!

They both started crying because Sarah took away the toy that was keeping Patrick happy and he pulled her hair in response. So I figured I'd buy both pairs of jeans and try them on at home. I was half way around the store before I realized that I'd forgotten to zip and button up my pants! Flashing the same store twice in 15 minutes-a new personal record. In the checkout line Patrick was still crying and I was looking for his cup so he would be quiet. Oh no-the cup's gone! I wouldn't have really cared except this was a fancy Dora cup with the flip-straw contraption that costs almost $10. I was not leaving that store without that cup! So I paid for our stuff and retraced our steps. The last place I checked was the dressing room. Someone was in that room so the sales girl, who remembered us very well, had to ask the occupant to pass it under the door. So $10 cup in hand I proudly stumbled out of the doors with a crying baby on my hip, a crying toddler clutched to my leg, and a huge, empty double stroller bumping into everything-and everyone-in front of me.

In typical fashion the little darlings passed out immediately in their carseats and slept all the way to their Daddy's work place, about 45 minutes away. We were going in to say hello to him and order Patrick's birthday cake before heading home. While I was talking to the bakery kid, I pretended I didn't notice the ominous smell coming from Sarah's direction. I ordered the cake as fast as I could and got the kids to the car. Just as I finished diapering Sarah, she was in need of a new one. Four diapers later, I was pretty sure the bout of diarrhea was over. We had to go back into the store to wash our hands, and after all of that it was time for Rick (my husband) to get off of work. I should mention that we got there around 4:15, and he got off at 5:30! So we just waited in the parking lot for him. When he saw us sitting there (actually "sitting there" really means Sarah was jumping on the backseat like it was a trampoline and Patrick was hanging halfway out of the front window yelling and waving at passers-by) Rick innocently asked, "What are you still doing here!?" When he saw my face-this is why I love him-he simply said, "We're buying something for dinner so you don't have to cook." God Bless my husband. :)

Thus concluded our Saturday outing. I'll be sure to share our Sunday adventures as soon as I get some more free time!

Monday, October 8, 2007

Welcome to my blog about my life as a mom

Welcome to my first (okay, technically not first, but first public...) attempt at blogging. I intend to share my many memorable mom moments, if nothing else than to vent! I have a three year old daughter and a one year old son. While they are the loves of my life they have definitely cost me much of my sanity! Nobody told me how challenging having two little ones can be. It's like a huge secret that women keep from each other to protect the human race-if we told each other how consuming it is to raise more than one kid, there would be a lot more only children running around! The good news is-as I'm slowly discovering-it does get easier, like all those veteran moms try to tell me. Since I'm sure people reading this are already members of the club, I am confident I can share my horror stories (which others keep assuring me will be funny one day) without causing a dent in the population.

For example, my most recent trip to the doctor's office went something like this:

After somehow feeding, bathing, and dressing the kids in less than 3 hours we all loaded into the car, miraculously only 5 minutes behind schedule. Of course Sarah (the 3 year old) decided she had to go to the bathroom right after we pulled out of the neighborhood. Anyone who has had a recently potty-trained kid knows that "holding it" is not an option. So back home we go, the potty we use, and back into the car, now (much more typical) a good 15 minutes behind.

When we finally arrived at the office (let me mention the Herculean effort it took to get 2 squirming babes out of their car seats, keep them from getting run over in the parking garage, put the baby into an umbrella stroller, and get off the elevator after stopping at every floor because Sarah mashed all the buttons, while I avoided eye contact with the other passengers) I had to occupy the rugrats. Occupying rugrats in a boring doctor's office is no easy task. I usually use food, but I was saving that for later when the doctor came in to see me.

Finally, after what seemed like hours I got to move into the examination room, which everyone knows is just a second waiting room. We had lots of fun making balloons out of latex gloves and looking through all the drawers and tearing pages out of magazines. The nurse came in and instructed me to "get undressed and put on this gown". The "gown" she refferred to was really a flimsy strip of see-through paper with huge arm-pit holes my boobs could hang out of and no back. So armed with animal crackers and absolutely no shame left in me, off came the clothes and on went the "gown". I should have seen this coming, but honestly I thought the doctor really would "be right in" because of all the commotion coming from our room. I was sure he'd want me outta there as soon as possible. But nope, he didn't come right in. So the kids were tired of playing doctor and getting hungry again by this point, and I started saying my prayer. You know the mom prayer that basically goes, "Please, God, let my kids be good for just a little longer so I can get through this. Please, please and I promise I will...." and so forth.

Guess what-the doctor did come in...right as I was chasing a renegade toddler around the exam table, in my "gown", sun-deprived butt totally exposed and jiggling behind me. Again employing the Avoidance of Eye Contact Trick, I hopped onto the table, silently chanted the mom prayer, and pretending the baby wasn't crying in the stroller and the little girl wasn't kicking and grunting in my arms.

After all my embarrassment, it just wasn't over: The doctor decided maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all, and made me reschedule for "sometime when the children aren't so fussy"! So I've come to the conclusion that the doctor visit isn't extremely important (at least not important enough to experience that again), and I will reschedule...for when the children are grown.

Of course my little ones fell fast asleep on the ride home. How can they look so sweet when they sleep!?