All In A Day's Work...

My dad stayed with us this past weekend. The kids have never spent time with him before so it was exciting to have him here for the whole weekend!

We went and picked him up Thursday afternoon and on Friday we went about our normal routine. I brought Sarah to school early in the morning and then waited for my dad to wake up. He and I had stayed up pretty late talking Thursday night so he didn't get out of bed till 10:30. He went outside on our back patio to wake up a bit and I decided to bring Luke with me and join him. Patrick was busy in his room playing with his train set. Several minutes of conversation passed and Patrick skipped through the door towards us. Using my excellent powers of observation, I noticed that he was wearing a different pair of denim shorts. I inquired about this change of clothes as it usually means he wet his pants. He denied having an accident, but the "innocent" smile and twinkle in his bright blue eyes alerted me that something truly terrible had occurred.

I went inside the door and saw a puddle on the floor. I was actually relieved at this point because the puddle was on the tile for once instead of on the carpet. Just as I was hollering for Patrick to come inside to help clean up his mess, my voice trailed off and my stomach sank as my my eyes followed the "puddle"....down the entire length of the hallway...and to the carpets on either side of the tile...and down the hall all the way to the bedrooms...

The back of the house was flooded. Literally flooded. I tossed the baby to my dad and ran to the bathroom to turn off the full-force running faucet of the bathtub. The tub had clearly not been drained from bath time and was three-quarters full when Patrick turned the water on. I really should have taken pictures-it was bad. But that was not the time to bust out the camera. I had to move FAST to get towels onto the carpet in order to stop the water from seeping into it even more. Then I had to get the shop-vac from the utility room and take the baby so my dad could start sucking up the water all down the hallway. Of course, this occurred at the exact time I had to get Sarah from school. So I left my poor dad to shop-vac the water while I went to retrieve Sarah.

When we got back to the house dad had the water up from the tile, but the carpet was a different story. I tried everything-spent an hour breaking my back carrying my huge baby and soaking up water with towels, the shop-vac...it was soooo much; there was no way to get it all up. I set up fans to try to dry it to no avail. (Of course my husband came home later that evening and asked what I was doing while the house was flooding. I even had a witness and he still didn't believe me that it was a matter of MINUTES-seriously no more than 3 MINUTES-that all this happened.)

It gets better: while I was slaving away trying to dry up our carpet Patrick dumped out a gallon-sized ziplock baggie full of cookies. I hate trying to explain these disasters to my husband...I know it's hard to believe unless it happens to you, but it does really happen in a blink of an eye, before there's time to react. So I vacuumed up the cookies and as I was putting the vacuum away I heard Sarah and Patrick starting to argue. I sprinted to the kitchen where they were sitting at the bar counter and right in mid-sentence: "STOP-YOU'RE GOING TO SPI....." the kids knocked over my glass of Coke. Onto my laptop. At this point I was at wits' end and spanked both of them on the spot and banished them to their room. I looked at the clock--and shook my head when I saw that it was not even noon.

It is a little sad, but I was glad that my dad was there to witness the events of the morning. He was able to back up my story and basically give me a little credibility with my hubby.

If anyone has any tips for the carpet I would LOVE to hear them. It smells horrible, like mildew. I can't seem to get all the water out no matter what and now that it has been a few days it seems like the damage is permanent. Sigh...

I have come to the conclusion that no matter how much I want to, I do not have power over who my kids are. I had always believed that parents could control how their kids turn out...you know, if they are "good" or "bad", what they like, their personalities. But then I had kids! All of a sudden I didn't know everything! I know it's up to me to keep them safe, happy, and healthy, but most everything else is up for grabs.

I have my little Sarah, my only daughter and I am aware that she is a tad more high-maintenance than most 5 year old girls. She's definitely spunky and mischief follows her like a second shadow; she possibly borders on the edge of normal behavior as far as trouble-making goes. But I don't think she is too strange....

Luke is as close to the perfect baby as you can get, in my completely unbiased opinion. ;) A little clingy, but I like that in a baby.

And then there is Patrick. He's...a challenge. This is not a bad thing necessarily. Just the way it is. Just the way HE is. I have tried to show him which behaviors are acceptable and which ones are not by example, with bribes, by explaining, basically you name it I have tried it. Nothing works-he is definitely his own person. And that drives me crazy! It is so hard to let go of that control...the control I think I am entitled to because they are MY kids. I finally realized they are only mine to raise-they actually belong to God-He only blessed me with the (sometime very difficult) job of taking care of them. I have often asked God why he chose these particular children to be matched with this particular mother. He has not answered, and if He has I was too busy cleaning up some disaster to notice.

Everyday there is something that Patrick does to make me seriously wonder if there was some mix-up at the hospital...did he really come from ME!? Is this weird? I don't know if it is normal to feel that way about your own child? I love him the exact same way as I love my other kids, but he is the only one that makes me question if the right mom got the right babe.

For example: the other day Luke was minding his own business when out of nowhere PatPat walked up to him, bent down, and picked the baby's nose...and ATE what came out. ATE IT! How disgusting is that!?!? It's not enough for him to pick his own nose, he has to do it to his brother, too. All I know is that did not come from MY side of the family.

Another example of Patrick's odd personality: he truly believes he is Peter Pan. Truly. I am just waiting for the day to come we have to visit the ER (again) because he thinks he can fly. For now he is satisfied with jumping off the couch, but I know he will try a more ambitious (read: dangerous) location and it is just a matter of time. He carries a stick around and says it's his "dagger" and he is always rescuing Wendy.

He watches TV on the couch. Seems normal, right? Wrong! He watches it on the couch...upside down, standing on his head. And he comes out of his room every single day with his underwear on backwards as well as his pants. Every day.

Anyway...I guess there's no point except Patrick puzzles me. I hope I'm doing this parenting thing right...

Why?

Wow, two posts in one morning-I'm on a roll! I pumped myself up with a pep-talk promising that I would try harder to record my children's funny (and maybe not-so-funny?) antics.

As I was finishing my last entry I looked at the clock and realized it was time to pick Sarah up from preschool so I was rushing and I told Patrick to get in the car. While I was strapping Luke into his carseat Patrick was on the other side looking at me. Being in a hurry I didn't realize what that look meant. When I went to his side to buckle him in, I figured it out: "I peed." WHY!? Why pee in the car!? Five seconds ago you were in the house! Three seconds ago you were outside surrounded by all the trees and shrubs a little boy could hope for. ARGGG!!!

I had no choice but to strip him and throw his clothes in the carport. He rode to Sarah's school naked. Now I have to go out there and clean pee from the carpet of my truck. Ew.
Oh yeah, and the main reason for this blog entry:
When I got to the school and signed Sarah out I realized I forgot to put shoes on.

Halloween.

My kids were so excited for Halloween. I made the mistake of turning the TV the first of the month, which is when the genius programmers started airing Halloween-themed shows. For an entire month every single day I answered a hundred times, "No, Halloween isn't today..."

Finally, the wait was over for all of us. They donned their costumes at 7 am. I had back up costumes because it was a very good possibility that they would not make it through the day. I had a few things planned to make the wait for Trick-or-Treating go easier.


First, we went to Wal-Mart in the morning. I had Patrick in the seat of the buggy, Sarah in the back, and Luke in the sling. After browsing the store aimlessly (yes, if you are from a small town as well you will know this is how we kill time...at Wal-Mart!!) I heard Luke's rumbles and thought "uh-oh"...when babies in slings poop it is bad news cause the poop has no where to go but....everywhere. So you can imagine my delight when I felt the sling and it was dry. Being unprepared as usual I picked up a pack of diapers and a case of wipes (I needed them anyway) and parked the buggy in the aisle and headed into the bathroom with my brood. Okay, the poop was NOT contained. Luke's cute little black, glow-in-the-dark onesie was ruined-I took it off and threw it in the trash; it was not salvageable. Of course I had to line the nasty diaper changing station with about 33 paper towels and OF COURSE they were everywhere. In the process of taking his clothes off poo got...okay let's just get to the point: I had to give my naked, squirming baby a bath in the Wal-Mart sink. Trust me, it was that bad. Did I mention I also had Sarah and Patrick? Yes, well they stood in the corner of the bathroom like good children so I could concentrate on taking care of the huge, disgusting mess I had on my hands (and on everything else!). GOTCHA!! They did no such thing-they did however lock themselves in a stall and pull toilet paper out. Thank goodness I was preoccupied or I would have really freaked out about the germs. So after I had the situation back under control I lined the sling with paper towels (it wasn't too bad in there) and put Luke back into it with only a diaper. I tried to find another Halloween onesie, but they were sold out-Grrrr. I did find little shirts though so I settled for that and it turned out to be cuter anyways so it all worked out.

Next, we headed to Publix for food. That trip was surprisingly uneventful. We came home and after changing into play clothes we carved pumpkins. That took an hour. Carving a pumpkin with 3 kids is hard. I should have taken a picture, but it was so ugly I did not want to remember it. So back into costumes and back to Publix for Trick-or-Treating. We followed daddy home because he got off work as they were finishing getting their candy.

It was finally time to go Trick-or-Treating around our neighborhood and we rode in a hayride with our neighbors...well we were supposed to anyways. We got about halfway down the street and somehow Patrick fell out of the back. I had to bail out holding the baby so I could scrape my son off the pavement, and of course Sarah followed me because she does whatever everyone else is doing. So we unanimously decided that the hayride was not a good idea for us. They got lots of candy and had it for breakfast the next day because, well, they only get that twice a year (after Easter is the other time) and who cares!? :)

I wish I could write my memories immediately before I forget them. I'm going to work on that.........................
...And one more thing: I know my pictures aren't the greatest (haha) but I actually like that because it shows my kids' true personalities and not posing smiles, ya know?

Fun Times

Yesterday started out so good I KNEW something was going to happen. Rick had to close last night so he didn't go in till 1. We hung out with him till he had to go to work, then we had lunch. After we cleaned up we dug out all the Halloween decorations and dusted them off and headed outside. Two hours later the front porch looked spooktacular; we even put a creepy face on the tree outside with a kit from the Dollar Store. I really get into decorating for holidays-it is so fun and a great way to have a nice time with all the kids. It gives moms a good reason to act like a kid.
I should take pictures....

We went inside to change clothes so we could go to Publix. We got back home very late Friday night from a week in Orlando and we needed to re-stock the house. The plan was for me to shop, then Rick would take his lunch break and we would already be there to eat with him.

We pulled into a spot-a really good spot!-and I was trying to get all the kids out before the car got too hot. Of course Sarah was jumping around acting like a fool and when I opened the door she fell out onto the pavement. Into a pile of freshly spat out chewing tobacco. Nice. My luck I would park and have my kid fall out into the pile of some nasty dude's dip...come on! If you're going to have such a dirty habit carry a cup so innocent children don't fall into it!!

Shopping went as smoothly as it ever goes with three kids in tow. When we got to the checkout I had the same sinful thought I have every single trip to the store: "I want to strangle whoever puts these displays of candy and gum right here..." Of course it was madness-kids flowing out of the cart (they always seem like more than two children when they pull stuff like this...), hands grabbing anything within reach.....So I managed to get Patrick into the cart pretty easily; he was sitting in the seat. Sarah was a little more difficult, but a bribe worked. I finished putting my stuff on the moving belt thing, and I realized something was missing: a cannister of oatmeal. Patrick was gnawing on it and right as I said, "Patrick I need tha...." he got the plastic seal off. You know how oatmeal containers close? With a stupid flimsy round peice of cardboard that barely fits into top? Yeah well that useless lid popped open sending oats flying everywhere, all up Patrick's nose, all over the floor, Sarah's hair, the candy racks....everywhere. I especially felt bad for the lady standing behind us in line; she was very understanding. Sarah thought it was great-she was giggling and digging through the dust in the back of the buggy. Patrick and I just stood there looking equally shocked. I don't think he expected it to open. Poor Luke was stuck in the sling and I was trying to flick oatmeal off of his head without getting any into his eyes.

The cashiers know us there so no one even said anything, she just looked at the bag boy, whom looked over at one of the coordinators, whom pointed at us to another employee, whom promptly got a broom and dustpan along with a clean up cart. I mean how sad is that!? No words exchanged? No explaination?? Just a point???

Seriously, how badly do we need food? Sigh....badly enough to go back next week.

Okay I try hard not to complain about being tired. Afterall, it is a staple of motherhood, expected and temporary. But after Patrick's birth I learned the TRUE meaning of sleep-deprivation....I am not even going to go back down that memory lane. But trust me, it was very, very bad.

So compared to what I have experienced this isn't so terrible, but Waaaaahh!! I'm sleepy!!!
Last night we had all of the children in our bed with us by 12:30 am. We normally can make it till about 3, but oh well. So between the hours of 12 and 3 Sarah woke up twice for a drink, Patrick woke up sobbing uncontrollably for 20 minutes, and thankfully Luke somehow slept through it. At 3:30 Luke woke up to eat, which is unusual-he is my wonderful baby who sleeps all night, every night. :)

So at 3:45 I crawled my sorry behind back into bed and immediately feel a spreading wetness....I should have known all the drinks was going to add up to bad news for me. Patrick wet the bed. With all of us in it. So I spent 30 minutes fixing the bed, cleaning pee off of us, and changing clothes. At 4:45 Luke woke up yet again. And again at 6, this time up for good. Patrick carried on crying after the pee incident for a long time so being the unsympathetic mommy that I am I carried him out to the living room and dropped him on the couch alone. There he cried until the bed was cleaned up and I told him to stop crying or I was going to make him sleep on the couch. I didn't even feel bad-by this time I knew the night was a bust and sleep was a mere fantasy.

I have come to the conclusion that my husband is a big, unhelpful, well-rested weenie.
At some point during the pee and Luke's 2 nasty poop diapers (forgot to mention those...) I realized that he had conveniently vanished. I discovered him blissfully snoring away in Sarah's bed...alone and comfortable, and SLEEPING. Grrrrr.

Yesterday morning I was in the bathroom getting fixed up and I prayed: God, I really want to make it to Mass today. Please help me out. I know I haven't done much for you lately, but please, please help me just this one Sunday. Maybe not the most "proper" prayer technique, but I meant it! I had the kids dressed and their bag of church-approved playthings to keep them quiet/occupied. I had 10 minutes to leave so I decided to top the baby off so he'd last the 30 minute drive. I was making last-minute deals with the kids ("If you are really good for mommy at church I'll get you a lollipop when we go to Publix!") and it didn't look good-they were so busy arguing with each other they weren't listening to my bribery tactics.

Right as I was starting to become discouraged and make up LAME EXCUSES not to go, the neighbors called and asked if Sarah could come play. Now I know that Sarah really needs to go to Mass with me, but baby steps, right? So I pulled her clothes off and slapped a swimsuit on her and sent her to the neighbors' house to swim. Bad mommy taking the easy way out? Nah, I choose to think of it as God easing me back into His graces.

So just me and the boys headed off to church and it was awesome!! Patrick sat on the floor and played with cars, swayed along to the singing, and even sat still on the seat for a few moments just listening. Praise God!!! Luke was wide awake, but quiet and happy. This was just amazing. Finally it came time for the Eucharist and YUP something went wrong. This is afterall MY life-something always happens. :)

It was super quiet as it should be when Luke grunted and let it rip. Of course people turned to look and all I could do was point at him with an expression of "That was NOT me" on my face. So he carried on as long as he could and Patrick felt the need to explain to everyone gleefully, "Baby POOP!"...as if they didn't know. So I put Luke up on my shoulder to carry him to the bathroom and-LOOKOUT-projectile puke all over me. Scrambling for the cloth diaper to clean us up with I noticed my skirt had a familiar, uncomfortable moist feel to it. YAY!! Poop leakage all up baby's back and on my legs!! WOOHOO!!

So I made the embarrassing walk to the bathroom-mind you we are still in the middle of the most sacred prayer there is-and booked it out of there. Yes, I should have stayed, I mean it's just baby stuff, but I have to be proud of what I DID accomplish, not what I haven't ya know?

So in conclusion I had a really monumentous day (that is the longest I've made it through Mass in a looong time) and I feel renewed. I am back!! WOOT!