Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Poop Fest 2009

Okay this happened a while ago, but I am just now getting around to writing about it:
I met Rick up at his work so we could go to lunch at McDonald's. We sat down in the restaurant and I heard the tell-tale super loud noises coming from Luke's diaper so I waited a few minutes and walked to the car to change him. Figuring all was well since I waited the few minutes that it normally takes a newborn to finish pooping, I plopped him on the front seat and went to work.

Now being the seasoned mom that I am I already had the wipes lined up and the new diaper under the one about to be taken off. What could go wrong? Lots of things, my friends...lots of things...So there I was innocently unfastening the diaper when out of nowhere came this explosion-I mean I didn't have time to react at all, just BAM-poop squirting towards me at lightning pace. After 3 kids I had NO IDEA poop could travel at that rate of speed. None of it, and I mean NONE of it got on either of the diapers...it all landed directly on my (white) t-shirt.

So of course I had to laugh, I mean it was funny. I was literally coated from chest to naval in yellow mustard-y stuff. No problem, I'm no rookie. I know that you always need to have a change of clothes for yourself as well as the baby with you at all times in the car. So I checked the diaper bag-What!? No shirt!? I guess I should have checked the bag before the poop emergency. DOH!

I have to admit that if this had happened with my first I would have cried, then drove home so no one would ever know that I was covered in baby poop. If it had happened with the second I would have gone to Wal-Mart across the street and bought a new shirt so no one would ever know that I was covered in baby poop. Now that I have 3 I'm not sure if it is out of laziness or not having any shame left, but I just tucked a cloth diaper in my shirt collar like I was a 5 year old at a BBQ and walked into McDonald's to eat my double cheeseburger, not caring at all if anyone knew I was covered in baby poop.